i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
Randomize
