i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
