It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Randomize
