I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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