It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
