so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
Randomize
