You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
