Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
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