I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
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