well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
