If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I came so hard my ears popped.
God I need to hump something, right now.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
