you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
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