I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
