Quick, to the slutcave!
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
