We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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