well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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