when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
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