meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Randomize
