Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
