Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Randomize
