Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
She bit a glass in half.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
