do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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