This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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