You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Randomize
