woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
