I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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