My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
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