i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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