Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I deserve this hangover.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize