i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
