you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
