erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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