he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
