God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
