I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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