i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
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