Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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