# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
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