I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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