weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
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