Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
