Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
