look no pants
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
