he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Randomize
