...so i touched it.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
