look no pants
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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