You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Who wears a wallet chain?!
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
why is half of my head shaved?
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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