I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
