so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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