your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
